Tuesday, 24 June 2014

Them Knights Of Pendragon Are Right Bloody Good...


Corr Blimey! That was the most British thing I've ever read!!

I just put down Revolutionary War: Knights Of Pendragon, and ruddy 'ell me ol' china that was right good book that was!

Really? I read that - I didn't get it.

Ah, I'm not surprised in the least my fine American friend. For a start almost all of the characters that appear in this one have only been seen before in Marvel's short-lived, long-forgotten but much missed Marvel UK imprint.

Marvel uk? What the hell's uk? Is that another damn event I'm expected to follow like Marvel NOW?

No, no - not uk. U.K. as in the United Kingdom. Marvel U.K. - get it?

You mean England? They have comics in England?

*SIGH*

Anyway, just because this book is as British as bowler hats and pork scratchings, it doesn't mean that it's awesomeness can't be enjoyed the world over. I mean come on, you don't need to have been brought up on crumpets and cricket to think this is great:

Yup, even the most S.U.V. driving-est of my American readers can agree that there are few things more awesome a comic-book where the bad guys are Zombie King Arthur and his Zombie Knights of the Zombie Round Table.

All the undead Arthur scenes are great. The way he keeps going on about 'Zombie Excalibur' and 'Zombie Camelot' - I was pissing myself throughout. It's universally hilarious and simultaneously yet very, very British!

What? Since when is King Arthur British? Isn't he like the Black Knight's dad or something?

No, no the Black Knight is - - never mind.

If you yanks didn't think the 'King Arthur Hankering For Brains' thing was funny, then there's not much hope for the rest of this blog post. I mean the next thing I was going to talk about was how funny it was how Knights Of Pendragon writer, 2000AD veteran and proud Welshman Rob Williams re-introduced us to each of the characters by helpfully dividing them into the thoroughly helpful and telling categories of 'Welsh' and 'Not Welsh':


No, No, I got that one. Being Welsh is like being a hobbit or something right?

A hobbit? A hobbit - really? Oh my giddy aunt!

Your giddy who?

Never mind, never mind. Let's see if we can pull this shambles together before we it goes completely off the rails. I'm sure everyone out there got the joke in the last scene? Right? You know when the Knights call forth the secret weapon 'The Green Knight'. This guys like the Knight's own personal 'Infinity Man' (if you're a Forever People guy) or 'Mega-Zord' (if you're a Power Ranger guy) - except the Green Knight is empowered by everything that's good, strong, proud, noble and glorious about Britain.

So when he's called forth into modern day London, kinda like Gozer in reverse, he takes the form that best represents all of those positive qualities and emotions in today's British national consciousness.

So of course he shows up as a 30 foot tall Mo Farah:


What? What's wrong? You have a blank expression on your face. Mo Farah! Record breaking, Olympic champion athlete Mo Farah?

I think I know who you're talking about. He's related to that old Charlie's Angels chick right?

No, no he's not.

I think that about wraps it up for today. Revolutionary War: Knights Of Pendragon - a terrific book, reviving a ton of fantastic and greatly missed characters with a ton of action and even more humour. Hustle out to your local comic-book store and snag yourself a copy...

...unless you are American.

Phew, that was hard going. Somebody put the kettle on. I need a sit-down and a cup o' tea. Maybe I'll catch up on how England are doing in the World Cup.

Huh? They did what? By who? So can they still - -

Oh Bugger!
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