Friday, 28 January 2011

Finally The Answer To The Mystery...

I was innocently reading some classic 60s Green Lantern stuff minding my own business when I stumbled across the answer to that age old mystery...what really killed the dinosaurs?

Who would've guessed that it was bad government!
All Those In Favour Of Increasing The Snazzy Headband Budget Say Aye

Damn those Pterodactyl bureaucrats and their bitchin' 80s fashion! No wonder they never get anything done.

(Today's prehistoric politics was brought to you by the good people at Green Lantern v2 #30 wherein the back-up strip Hal Jordan tricks fellow Green Lantern Katma Tui into dumping her fiance using a power-ring generated Emotion-Meter and a giant, fighting amoeba. Aren't you glad that guy's not your marriage councillor?)

Wednesday, 26 January 2011

Shake It Like A Polaroid Pygture...

I totally agree with Adam West, It's a damn shame that Batman doesn't dance anymore.

These days it's all left to the newest additions to Batman's Rogue's Gallery like Professor Pyg to get their old softshoe on:
If You Liked It Then You Shoulda Put a Pyg On It

Drop It Like It's Hot

I Can Have It All and I'm Dancing For My Life!

Nobody puts Pyggy In The Corner.

(Today's Johnny Castle-esque bumpin' & grindin' was brought to you by Grant Morrison and Frank Quitely's deeply creepy Batman & Robin #3 which features a dude who likes to melt fright masks onto the faces of his victims. Which seems gross until we meet the dude who likes to eat people's faces a few issues later. What is with those guys and faces?)

Friday, 21 January 2011

It's A Dog's Life...

Recently DC kicked off a new series called Adventure Comics that for the first few issues gave us back something we'd been missing since the heady days of the 90s. You remember the 90s don't you - those were some glory days for comics. Supermen died and came back with mullets, Green Lanterns were storing girlfriend parts in their fridges and a young whippersnapper named Spawn was duking it out with a foul-mouthed clown from hell month in and month out.

When I cracked open that first issue of Adventure comics I was transported back to those days as I stared in disbelief at a comic that starred Superboy!

Now when I say 'starred' I'm not talking a Teen Titans style supporting character role. I'm talking Conner 'Superboy' Kent front and centre in all his wall of reality punching glory!

Granted things have changed for Conner over the years. No longer is he bopping about Hawaii looking for trouble with news-reporting sex kitten Tana Moon. Nor is he sporting that horrendous 90210 haircut or that bitchin' leather jacket.

In fact in these issues of Adventure Comics he's taking things kind of slow and mellow. Hanging out at the Kent's farm in Smallville, going to school, going on dates with fellow Teen Titan and advocate of the 'jeans-as-acceptable-superhero-attire' look Cassie 'Wondergirl' Sandsmark.

In fact in this particular issue he spends most of his time angsting it up with his best bud Tim 'Robin/Red Robin' Drake:

Despite the complete lack of reality-punching these little character sequence are really enjoyable. I don't think Conner or Tim have had characterisation as good as this in a good long while. We get to see them renew their friendship talking about how it's no fun being 50% alien boy scout 50% bald megalomaniac or being the only one who believes your surrogate dad is bouncing around time dressed as a pirate. It's like watching a good episode of classic grunge teen-drama 'My So Called Life' only with batarangs and without that creepy mop-headed next door neighbour kid.

While all this touchy-feely bonding is good stuff we here at YouAreComic know that our loyal fans demand at least a little butt-kickery in their comic-books. Sadly with Conner trying to be a normal teenager he's a bit too busy 'finding himself' to engage in any proper super-heroic action.

Luckily this book comes with a familiar co-star who supplies all the butt-kickery even the most rabid YouAreComic action junkie could possibly want...and this co-star comes with a cape:

That's right folks Adventure Comics #3 gives you Krypto the Super-Dog kicking ass and taking names. While Conner's getting his emo on, his loyal, fuzzy pal is rounding up costumed bad guys and crazy 'mother-box' stealing wackos in effort to get his surly new master to give him a damn treat or at least a quick scratch behind the ears....

...and what does he get for his trouble?

Damn Kents. This new one is a dick just like that other one.

If I was Krypto I'd go hang out with Ace the Bat-Dog. All he does is slouch around the batcave peeing against the wheel of the batmobile and scratching himself on the giant coin...and he got a staring role in that Batman Of the Future cartoon.

Friday, 14 January 2011

Don't Worry Milhouse...

...even a fearless, iron-willed, cosmically-powered superjock armed with a supremely powerful power ring can fall victim to superior bullying abilities of that nefarious arch-fiend Nelson Muntz.

Better hand over that lunch money GL: