Friday, 25 May 2007

Nude Androids in Love...

First my Superman post and now this - people are going to think I'm a John Bryne groupie! It's not true honest - it's not me making those heavy breathing phone calls at 2AM John. I swear!

I can't help it if the man knows how to do good comic books and if my Supes post didn't convince you then feast your eyes on West Coast Avengers #45.

West Coast Avengers was intended to be a dumping ground for the dodgier heroes that Marvel didn't think were good enough to stand next to Cap in pin-ups of the regular Avengers team.It would've been too if not for creators like Steve Englehart and John Byrne.

They took all the pomp and ceremony of the regular Avengers book and mixed it with a pinch of daytime soap and came up with a series focused more on the wacky bunch who made up the cast than on battles against the earth shattering menace of Orka The Killer Whale or whoever.

This issue focuses on my favorite, and wackiest, Avengers couple. Scarlet Witch and the Vision - the android and the mutant, a love story for the ages:
Oooh Vision, geez Wanda, get a room

Normally the Vision would be getting down with Wanda's crazy hex loving like you know he should but a recent mind wipe has turned Vis into a cold fish.

Y'see the Vision's personality was originally donated by dead Avengers-baddie Wonder Man. Unfortunately for Vis, Wonder Man is alive and kicking again. Not only that, he's now a member of the WCA team and he's none to keen on the idea of donating his brain patterns to an android who's more of hit with the ladies than he is! See what I mean about the wacky. You gotta love it

Wanda is understandably upset by Wondy's selfish attitude about sharing his brain patterns. He tries to talk her round but you know what these high-strung, hex-powered mutant witches are like. One wrong word - -

- -and they drop a mountain on you:Women. I ask you.

As if the crazy circus that is the Wanda-Vision-Wondy love triangle isn't worth the price of this issue by itself - this issue also adds redneck bumpkin and unhinged Cap wannabee John Walker aka US Agent to the team - as team chairman no less.

He'll whip this degenerate bunch of perverts into shape if it's the last thing he does:
Ain't no nekkid android's gonna smartmouth me, I'm gonna whup yore transparent ass from here to Albuquerque boy!

That is my favorite scene in the whole book, it's just hilarious. John Byrne is funny, who knew?

Nude androids versus uptight, prudish good old boys dressed up as an American flag.

Only in comics my friends, only in comics.
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