Wednesday, 25 February 2009

Wonder Girl versus Air Force One...

The sheer volume of 'big event' mini-series/crossovers coming from Marvel and DC recently has meant that I've had to choose between the stuff I really want to read and the stuff I let fall by the wayside. One of the things I took a pass on was the whole 'Amazons Attack' hoopla. As it turns out a lot of people didn't care for it much anyway which is surprising considering it's by Will Pfeifer the writer of the never less than awesome (and recently cancelled - damn you DC!) Catwoman series.

Anyway recently I saw Amazons Attack issue 4 in the bargain bin of my local comic shop and I thought what the hell. So I bought it and read it completely out of context. Luckily my crazy twenty five pence gamble paid off - the issue was pretty damn good, a lot better than I was expecting. I had been misled! Out of all of the reviews of the series I read, a grand total of none bothered to mention that issue 4 features a titantic, never-seen-before battle of epic proportions: Wonder Girl versus Air Force One!

Check it out:
I'm afraid I'm going to have to ask you to step out of the vehicle sir

So Queen Hippolyta and her Amazons have invaded the US toasting the capitol and a few other major cities. Sensibly the powers-that-be have decided the president should get the hell out of dodge aboard Air Force One.

Unfortunately, somewhere over the Cheese State, they run across Cassie getting her inner-traffic-cop on.

Surely Cassie, like the rest of us, has watched enough Kevin Costner and Michael Douglas movies to know that when somebody threatens the President the folks assigned to protect him tend to get a little crazy. They're willing to go to extreme lengths to protect their boss.

Like say shooting an unarmed teenage girl in jeans and a belly top with an anti-aircraft missle for example:
Look out for that....Never mind

Why-oh-why the military of the DCU still think shooting at a chick wearing any variation of a Wonder Woman costume with a missle will do them any good at all is beyond me. These guys live in the same world as a guy who can juggle tanks and swallow grenades for crying out loud!

Anyway it's mere second before Cassie shrugs off being hit by a missle, trades her inner-traffic-cop for her inner-Kofi-Annan, and brokers a peace-deal using an unorthodox but highly effective negotiation technique.

Let us all bask in the joy of Amazonian diplomacy in action:
Peanuts? In-Flight Magazine? An Asskicking?

Take note world leaders! If you want to bring peace to a war-trn nation simply shoot their leader's plane with an angsty teenage girl and have her threaten him with a savage beating.

Cassie's foreign policy expertise might have ended the whole Amazonian invasion right then if not for the ill-timed Amazonian war-party who show up armed to the teeth and decide to take on a jumbo jet and it's military escort on their flying horses. Kind of a one-sided battle. The cutting edge weapons of the president's elite US Air Force planes versus a bunch of chicks dressed in armour, riding flying horses, toting swords and spears.
Chicks on Flying Horses 1, US Air Force 0

This was a great issue, it was a blast to read. I enjoyed it so much that I'm tempted to go out and hunt down the rest of the series bad reviews be damned! At the very least it's bound to deliver more Supergirl plane-catching, more Wonder Girl aging-world-leader-intimidation, lots of scantily clad chicks on horseback and all the Amazonian girl-on-girl action a growing boy will ever need.

Plus if I know Mr Pfiefer, the man who had Silver Age fop Angle Man stab Catwoman in the brain with a set square, he's bound to have some surprises in store along the way.

Perhaps even the long overdue, modern-age reimagining of the most awesome Wonder Woman related character who ever lived: Wonder-Tot!

Although probably not.
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